February 2012
1 post
January 2012
3 posts
It's Not Too Late To Post My 20 New Years...
1. Put butter in right butter shelf spot in refrigerator.
2. Don’t eat beans out of can. Put them in corn can and mix.
3. Figure out race.
4. Try to be more open with doors.
5. Let friends come over to apartment now that smell is gone.
6. Get more keys made. Just in case there is a key shortage because of a famine.
7. Start more feuds with rappers.
8. Call all exes and explain...
October 2011
1 post
August 2011
1 post
This song is entitled P.O.S. It appears in the...
July 2011
2 posts
June 2011
4 posts
May 2011
7 posts
April 2011
6 posts
Things That Happen In My Head - A Web Series about... →
My web series I’ve been fumbling through has been world wide webbed— so now you can find all that content in one place. Plus there’s going to be an entire page dedicated to what Sandwich Club is. In the works, people. In the works.
March 2011
3 posts
Welcome to LA
I’ve been living in Los Angeles for three months now. That figure makes my eyes water. Or maybe it’s the pollution. N-E-ways, today I was driving down the 110, which was moving at a snail’s pace (LA Traffic LoL Break) and suddenly I see a man in full pirate regalia, clothing, eye patch slung just above his eyes, bandanna, driving a (perhaps 2003) tan, Ford Taurus. That was the...
October 2010
2 posts
“The thing is, I really like saying yes. I like new things, projects, plans,...”
– Dave Eggers, on dismissing people as “sell-outs”. (via lunchbreak)
This is great! I need to remember this.
(via abbijacobson)
Love this. Especially the naked one.
(via cathrynmudon)
I’m glad this is getting kicked around the internet today. You should totes read the whole thing. This...
September 2010
2 posts
Expectations.
It was only a few years ago that I had expressed my life goal to be to own an island. Lately I’ve been walking around telling people that I intend to own a boat in the future. I suspect in five or so years I will settle for a tiny midget that constantly points out the planes in the sky to me.
Priorities.
The main thing that upsets me about Fox News is not that it packages fear and hatred as news, but that it makes me want to write status updates about serious discussion topics and not about how a Cocker Spaniel dog can look like a tiny woman wearing the right hat. And that, is unforgivable, Fox News.
August 2010
4 posts
Rebuttal.
This is an excerpt from an email I received regarding my last post. It was sent to me from someone I went to college with about five years ago. I guess you’ll be able to tell it’s from a woman I went to college with. It is copy and pasted exactly, word-for-word from the email.
“It really is amazing you would turn on your own kind. As if we don’t have enough prejudices and...
Gelato vs. Boats.
Why is it a woman going through a life crisis, who flies around the world, eats a bunch of gelato, touches an elephant which helps her find god, is celebrated as “letting go”, but a man going through the same life crisis, who buys a red corvette or a boat, is judged as being immature and silly? You could say both are attempts at self-exploration, just in different ways; yet, why...
David Justice.
I’ve never been good at romance. I tend to bumble the whole emotions part of the deal, which I suppose is an important aspect of romantic relationships. As I’ve gotten older and compiled a record of second-guessed, bumbling, romantic decisions, I’ve come to figure out specifically who is to blame for turning me into this monster. The 1995 Atlanta Braves.
I was a guest fan of...
Personal growth.
A friend from my hometown of Syracuse called today to share some exciting news with me. He purchased a house on a 13-acre plot of land. Four bedrooms. Three point five baths. A back patio with a pool. The land includes a babbling brook at the edge of the property. He told me that since it’s been so hot, it was more of stuttering brook than a babbling brook. He laughed. I acknowledged what...
July 2010
3 posts
Notes.
Several of the things I’m working on right now are based on stories directly pulled from my life (mostly the awkward period of my life from age 1-25). Perhaps my favorite part of the development process is getting notes back from people that are direct accusations about my behavior in the stories. “Why would a person do this? Is this believable? Why would someone steal three cats from...
June 2010
6 posts
Kate Spencer: Pancreatic Cancer Killed My Mom, And... →
This is an email I just sent to friends and family. Please read, and please call. And please, please reblog (PLEASE) and help me spread the word. It would mean a lot to me.
This past June 14th marks 4 years since my mother Martha was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. June 17th would have been…
Watchbreakupyourband:
purns:
Rachel Maddow just heaps praise on the BP Spills Coffee video, and makes her own case for why she should start hanging out with us.
Directed by Pete Schultz and Brandon Bassham
Written by John Frusciante, Eric Scott, Gavin Speiller, and Erik Tanouye
Edited by Pete Schultz
Starring Eric Scott, Nat Freedberg, Kevin Cragg, Gavin Speiller, Kate McKinnon, John...
The Temptations - Papa Was A Rolling Stone
...
May 2010
5 posts
About a dolphin
I told a friend this morning about a blog called: http://myexwifesweddingdress.com/ which is pretty self-explanatory. It’s a blog about a guy using his ex-wife’s dress for various non-normal-wedding dress stuff. My friend asked me if I had ever seen this blog: http://ayearfollowingthebreakup.blogspot.com/ — I hadn’t.
It’s an old blog from 2005-2006 written by a...
Never a bride, always a show.
I called my mom today to ask her where I could get wedding flowers and disposable wedding glasses. She paused for a good 10 seconds, then asked, “Jessica— are you, getting married?” I replied, “No— I need them for a show I wrote.” She regrouped then said, “It’s always a show.”
Speaking of my seemingly indefinite bachelorettehood, mark this on...
WatchI don’t understand how a grown white man can’t understand how dumb and superficial it is to say “I marched on Washington with Martin Luther King Jr. when I was in high school” as justification for how banning race studies in Arizona isn’t at all racist. You might as well say “I’m in a carpool with a black guy. I think his name is George?”
